Sara Ferrer: [00:00:00] Welcome to Fearless and Flawed. Today we're joined by Alreen Haeggquist. Alreen is a trauma-informed mindset coach, bestselling author, and speaker who transforms her survival of childhood sexual abuse into a mission of empowerment and healing. As managing partner at Haeggquist and Eck LLP, she has recovered millions in workplace justice cases and now inspires others through her coaching, speaking, and book fired up fueling triumph from trauma.

Serena Reynolds: In this conversation, we'll explore how re turned personal trauma into triumph, what it means to fight for justice inside and outside the courtroom, and how she helps others reclaim their power and voice. 

Sara Ferrer: We'll also talk about her path to writing her book, the tools she uses to guide clients through [00:01:00] healing and growth, and the lessons she's learned about resilience, leadership, and living with purpose.

Serena Reynolds: And I'm Serena and I build systems that make leaders impossible to ignore. Turning podcasts into pipelines and webinars into cash machines. 

Sara Ferrer: And I'm Sara, an email marketing pro here to convert clicks into cash. Together we're two women in charge, digging into the fearless, the flawed, and the fabulous journeys of female founders rewriting the rules.

Serena Reynolds: Let's dive in. Welcome to our show, Alreen. 

Alreen Haeggquist: Oh, thank you so much for having me and for the introduction. 

Serena Reynolds: Alreen, your journey is such a powerful blend of personal resilience and professional advocacy. Can you take us back to the moment you realized your own story could become a source of healing and empowerment, not just for you, but for others as well?

Alreen Haeggquist: I would say that's fairly recent. You know, it was something, my story of what happened to me as a child was something I kept secret for so long and I thought that's where it [00:02:00] needed to be, to be powerful, to be a business owner, to be a lawyer. I thought I needed to hide that, but it was really my clients teaching me as they told their story and seeing them be empowered from speaking out, standing up to their abuser, going through the system, and seeing them on the other side of their healing.

Alreen Haeggquist: That also allowed me to see how powerful that was. Right. I experienced it through therapy and talking to my therapist, but letting it out publicly was really something I learned from my clients. I would say that's been in the past, I don't know, probably five years or so. 

Sara Ferrer: Wow. And did that change the trajectory completely of career?

Sara Ferrer: Like, you know, one thing is to be working with clients, the other is to be working through your own personal trauma. So how did that. Collide conflict, enhance kind of your day to day, maybe change gears, enhance the the current journey. 

Alreen Haeggquist: I would say it's definitely enhanced, which is again, why I wrote the book and why I'm, you know, come on podcast and why I'm [00:03:00] so passionate about doing the work that I do, because it has enhanced so many areas of my life.

Alreen Haeggquist: Not only my personal, like mental wellbeing, my, my physical wellbeing, my relationships, not only with my husband, my child, but with my friends and colleagues. Um, and just feeling just good in your own skin, right? It's allowed that shame and that fear that you really hold because of sexual abuse. To really get lifted by going through the, the process of speaking out.

Sara Ferrer: Well, walk us through your, your, what, what does the advocacy look like for those that are listening? 'cause we, we know a little bit about you, we've chatted a little bit before. Walk us through, what does that look like when we talk about advocacy, speaking out career, like walk us through day to day and then big picture.

Alreen Haeggquist: Sure. So I'm a lawyer out here in San Diego and I represent primarily women in cases of sexual assault and sexual harassment, primarily in the workplace. It can also be against institutions and for women that have suffered inequities, right? You're [00:04:00] not getting paid the same, you're not getting treated the same, just primarily because of your gender and no other reason.

Alreen Haeggquist: So I represent those women against large corporations here in the United States against powerful individual to really think the law doesn't apply to them, right? They're have been acting with this idea that they can do what they want because you know the size of their company or the amount of money in their bank account, or the positions of power that they hold.

Alreen Haeggquist: And so my job is to help women stand up to them, right? Because they're really here, like the other individual is always coming in with a lot more resources. Have been telling them typically that nobody's gonna believe them. They've experienced that, right? They've experienced people not believing them and, and being told like, I'll let it go.

Alreen Haeggquist: Move on. This will be a career killer. You shouldn't say anything. And so then to have them come into my office and really just that first step of letting them know what their rights are, right? Let, letting them know what their laws are and how many laws do actually protect them, right? Because they [00:05:00] start in a place that.

Alreen Haeggquist: They don't think that exists based on their experience and what they've been told. So the first part of advocacy to me is teaching the women that come into my office about the rights that they have and the protections that they have and their options of the things that they can do. They then get to make a choice of which path they wanna go on.

Sara Ferrer: When, when you say it this way, it's like, wow, this is very empowering, right? This is if something has happened. There's someone like you to go to, there's someone like you to fight the dragon, the slay the dragon. But naturally we know that we are living in a society where doubt is usually a first line of, of a reaction.

Sara Ferrer: What do you find in your experience for those listening that until they find you right, um, what do they hear, what do they experience? What are maybe the subtleties, the subtle, you know, nudge, nudge. It's better off if you keep your mouth [00:06:00] shut. Like, how can you help enlighten us with those day-to-day conversations that I'm sure happen in, in families, in coworker settings, and again, sometimes.

Sara Ferrer: Not even mal intended, right? Sometimes it's, maybe this is for your best, but how can you help educate us towards kind of those danger zones that we, we live in every day when it comes to hearing the story and first reactions and then how it kind of bubbles up to you and you go, oh, no, no, no, no, no. Don't believe that there's something here to really, you know, to really work with.

Alreen Haeggquist: So I'm definitely a last resort. You know, nobody wakes up in the morning and is like, I wanna go see a lawyer and bring a lawsuit. That's not how most people wanna live their, their life. Um, and so they come to us really as a last resort. They have tried to speak out like to a boss or human resources, or they've tried to bring it to somebody's attention and they haven't been listened to, or they're scary because of the [00:07:00] ramifications, right?

Alreen Haeggquist: They are, you know, professionals, they're worried about. How it's gonna affect them professionally. Like what people are gonna view them as troublemakers, or they're worried about, you know, maybe what their husband will think or their boyfriend when they find out that they were sexually assaulted by someone else.

Alreen Haeggquist: They're worried about the family ramifications really sometimes against the person that's been abusing them. Right. If I come forward, how is this gonna affect this abuser's family and his team? So there's a lot of fear as to what's gonna happen if they come forward. And then there, there's a lot of shame attached to it as well, because.

Alreen Haeggquist: No matter what. No matter, even though they've done nothing wrong and it's not their fault, the first reaction is always, what could I have done differently? Right? How did I get myself in the situation? I shouldn't have been there. Maybe I shouldn't have said that. I shouldn't have gone out to that dinner.

Alreen Haeggquist: If I didn't attend that conference, this wouldn't have happened. I mean, you always go through all the things you could have done to avoid what this person did to you, 

Serena Reynolds: but is there [00:08:00] also an element of empathy as well for the abuser? Yes, exactly. In a, in a, in a strange kind of way. You know, maybe may, you know, not just what did I do wrong?

Serena Reynolds: Maybe, maybe I, I misinterpreted, maybe, you know, they're nice in so many other ways, but I don't like this. Do you, do you come across that a lot? 

Alreen Haeggquist: Well, for sure, and especially in a, in a relationship where you're close to the person, the the person that abused me was my father. So talk about empathy, right?

Alreen Haeggquist: This is the person that raised you, and so it, it is complicated in that sense, right? They've done these things for you that are nice or that have supported you in some way. Then they've done this horrible thing to you and you're trying to reconcile that, right? Your feelings towards that. And so, you know, some of the things they do, one, they just try to avoid situations, so it stops.

Alreen Haeggquist: They've tried to speak out, like I said, to a boss or somebody above the person to try to get it to [00:09:00] stop. And either the, you know, they've been told, you know, we don't really have any evidence. We can't really prove it. He says he didn't do it, so we gotta move on from it. And or they've been told, you know, if you do that, if you say anything, you're gonna get fired.

Alreen Haeggquist: Or if you say anything, you know, you're gonna lose. You know this, the stock options or this bonus that you've been getting, whatever it may be, they think there's going to be a ramification for coming forward. And so, um. At some point they can't essentially take it anymore. Right? Like it's gone to be too far.

Alreen Haeggquist: And that's when they show up at the, at my office. Like they don't know what else to do because they feel like they've tried different things. It's not going away. It's impacted them. Like sometimes they have to go out on medical leave because of how it's affecting them. They're on unable their jog because of the impact it's affecting their relationship, their home life.

Alreen Haeggquist: Right? And so. They're kind of at wit's end and that's how they, they, they show up to me and they're [00:10:00] usually really anxious, really scared. They don't really know what, what they can do. But yes, they've heard about me in some way and they show up at my office to get more information. Really. 

Serena Reynolds: So when you say that you are the last resort, you really are.

Serena Reynolds: The, they're, they're jumping off a cliff really at that point because there's, they, they've got nothing else to lose. So that's really, that's, that must be hard for you to, to, to be in that situation and to talk to these women or, or people. I'm not just going to just bucket into women there. I mean, that must take quite a toll on you as well.

Alreen Haeggquist: Yeah, we have it. It is, there's a right. Listening to other people. And I definitely carry, like my client stories, I really do carry them with me. So a person in our office who's our survivor advocate, advocate, she also helps us, you know, from being re-traumatized by taking on other people's trauma. So we work on our own self-care.

Alreen Haeggquist: Um, but that is the, the, [00:11:00] I feel like my purpose and what I've meant to do, and I do enjoy helping the women. I do, especially because I know what it's gonna look like. On the other side, right? I know how they're feeling right now is temporary and I know they don't believe it, right? Like at, when they come into my office and I tell them this, I go, I know it doesn't feel like it right now, but I promise you you're gonna be so much better off, you know, at the end of this.

Alreen Haeggquist: It's just, you can't see it right now. But I can from my experience. Um, the other thing I think that's really comforting to them. Is that I remind them that what you're hearing is what we hear in every single case, right? We call it the three lines of defense. And you're gonna get this in every single case.

Alreen Haeggquist: And the first line is always to deny that it never happened, right? You never did that. You're just making it up. I don't know what you're talking about. And when they can't do that anymore because there's some pieces of evidence, or there's, you know, really like a document or they can't refute it, then they go to the second line, [00:12:00] which is, well, she wanted it.

Alreen Haeggquist: We had a consensual relationship. We were dating. She asked for it. She's the one who, you know, asked me out. Um, and they always go to that level. And then the third one is always to attack you. Right? To attack who you are as a person, who you are as an employee, how you're a terrible employee, that you're just doing this to get back at him for some reason, or you're just doing this to get back at the company, whatever it may be, they attack you and all of a sudden.

Alreen Haeggquist: You've gone from like, you know, the star employee at the office to like the worst employee that ever lived on Earth. And that's really hard for, for people, right? Like to experience that. But I think knowing that that's what they do to defend these cases, I think. Lets them know that they're not alone and it's not personal, it's just how the, the other count defends what they did because they know their actions are against the law.

Sara Ferrer: I'm so annoyed just by hearing that though, like, I'm so, like, disgusted, like, [00:13:00] like you say it, like this is, and I like for people, if you are watching on YouTube or if this is a video, like, sir, I was looking at Serena's face, like every single line of defense are. Faces kept sprinting up. And I was like, I was like, wait until they say she's just crazy.

Sara Ferrer: Wait until, and that's basically the third line of defense. She's just disgruntled. She's just crazy y and I'm like, so, wow. How, how do you not wanna just lose? I mean, I know you talk self-care, but like this is some heavy shit where it's like, even though there's a pathway, it's like, um, it's like this is still difficult, right?

Sara Ferrer: Like. 

Serena Reynolds: Just, just jumping in there. I, as, as you were saying, the three lines of defense, the, the, whatever, however you said it, it. Sara. So I do show my emotions on my face, anyone that watches the video. But I have to admit, I actually kind of found that quite, um, reassuring. If you can actually tell people this [00:14:00] upfront, this is what's going to happen.

Serena Reynolds: Then, then, then when they get attacked, when they go through those three stages, they're expecting it. And I think that's, that's really powerful to be able to give that to them. 

Alreen Haeggquist: I agree. I I think so too, because then they know it's not them, it's just their method of defending this action. Right? They don't, they don't have anything else to defend it, so that's how they do it.

Alreen Haeggquist: And we are prepared for that. We know this is what's going to happen, so we prepare on the front end to respond to these things. 

Sara Ferrer: Does it ever make you, I, I wonder this, 'cause again, I, I appreciate that. Here's what's coming. You sound like an optimistic person. You sound like a was a, did it ever just make you say, humans suck?

Sara Ferrer: Like do you ever just have that moment though where it's hard to say though, this is the process and that's reassuring. This is a process that is so predictable. That now you have kind of this foreshadowing of, of what's come. How do [00:15:00] you draw that barrier of yeah, there are shitty people. This is a process, but like you don't lose your faith, you don't lose your trust in humanity, you don't lose your ability to fight for the little guy.

Sara Ferrer: Like how, what does that look like? I know you mentioned self-care, but mentally, physically, spiritually, mantra wise, because that must be tough just to then walk out of the office and believe that, you know, humanity is good some days. 

Alreen Haeggquist: I, because I surround myself with really good people. I think they're the, when you surround yourself with these amazing humans, you know, you see the other side of, of what good humanity looks like.

Alreen Haeggquist: And I have that in the people that I work with. I have that with my friends. I have that with my husband. I have that with my daughter, right? Like. You see that and that's who you make your community and the people that you associate with. And you recognize that there are bad people and Ill intent people, and that's what I feel like my job is to let them know they don't get away with it and there are repercussions to it.

Sara Ferrer: I love that I. We talk about [00:16:00] community a lot. Like that's it, like good, everything in life is balanced, right? There's bad people. You're on, you're on the right side. You know, 

Serena Reynolds: I'm not even, I'm, I mean, I'm, I'm jumping in here. I'm not even sure that there is just black and white bad people, good people. I think we're all shades of gray somewhere.

Serena Reynolds: And, um, I, I think, you know, there's a lot, lot to be said about, uh, learned behaviors, you know, the, the age of individuals, what the standards were when they grew up, and there's so many variables. I'm not defending anybody here. Um, but one of the things that, that. Really struck me in recent years was the Me Too campaign where women were writing Me Too on their social media, and it was just like mind blowing because things that.

Serena Reynolds: To be perfect, honest, when I was younger, you would literally just, just ignore the, the, the kind of things that [00:17:00] happened or the comments that were made, or you know, the as simple as the wolf whistle walking down the road in your school uniform. Come on guys, we are kids. It felt very different. And then all of a sudden you start thinking, actually no, that wasn't right, that was wrong.

Serena Reynolds: And. So, yeah, I dunno where I'm going with this, but I think the Me Too campaign and when, when you just saw this whole sea of people, women and men posting up Me Too. And you know, touching on their stories, just realized how widespread and what a big problem it all really was. 

Alreen Haeggquist: I think about 50% of the people have been sexually.

Alreen Haeggquist: Assaulted. I mean, that's staggering to me, right? 50% of us, and I think that's actually a lower number than it actually is, because people don't report. 

Serena Reynolds: I, I, I would, I don't work in your industry, but from [00:18:00] conversations, more private conversations, I would say that you, you are absolutely bang on that. It is much higher than that.

Alreen Haeggquist: But I, I, you know, I was in awe of the Me Too movement. I think it finally gave women like knowledge that they weren't alone, because that's the thing they've always thought. We've always thought we're all by ourselves. It was only happening to us and it wasn't happening to other people. And so I think the Me Too movement really opened the door to let other women know that you're not alone.

Alreen Haeggquist: And by speaking out, you're helping another woman come forward. Right? So she knows she's not alone in that process. With respect to your other comment, you know, I, I am one of those people that do believe, there are some people that are innately just bad. They were born that way in some way. I'm an excuse, like the dark side.

Alreen Haeggquist: They have it. Um, but then I, I agree. There are good people who do bad things, right? They're not innately that way, but they make bad decisions or the way they're brought up or whatever it may be. They do bad things. [00:19:00] Unfortunately, I never go into situations where they say, Hey, I'm sorry. I wish I hadn't done that.

Alreen Haeggquist: I made a bad decision. You know, that does not happen in any of my cases. That's what I'm saying. Like so they could be a good person who did a bad thing, but they cannot like become accountable for their actions. They don't acknowledge it and they don't show accountability for it, which is what the legal process is there for.

Alreen Haeggquist: It's to say, no, this is how we show accountability. It's by letting you bill that you can't 

Alreen Haeggquist: do 

Alreen Haeggquist: that. 

Sara Ferrer: No, that makes perfect sense. And how is the coaching aspect? Because you are, you know, per the intro, like you, you are partner at this law firm, right? But you're also a coach. It's the power of the voice that I think that that is, maybe I'm loosely saying when I'm, 'cause we've interviewed like life coaches, quote unquote, but I think there's more of this, especially with writing the book, which we'll get into.

Sara Ferrer: Co, let me rephrase. Coaching not in a, I'm a health coach, [00:20:00] life coach, trauma coach per se, but you've experienced trauma, you've experienced personally, which at the end of the day when we talk to quote unquote coaches, there's always the personal experience, but is elevated them to be in a position to guide others.

Sara Ferrer: So let me clarify with that, that I think when I say coach, the the, the guidance, the writing, the book, the evolving like typically. At least in my experience when it has come to lawyers, you know, writing a book about a personal traumatic experience and rising from that, that really sets you apart in terms of kind of that opening up.

Sara Ferrer: And I think lawyers in general, at least this day and age in society, we don't really perceive many of them to have kind of that. Other side, if you will. And so that's what I'm referring to when I say coach is like, okay, how do you take that personal, that trauma? You wrote the book, does that come in like touchy feely?

Sara Ferrer: I hear what you're saying. I feel you. Or is there no place for that in law? [00:21:00] Is this very, like, this is very black and white, how we're gonna do it and let's leave the, the other maybe emotional part of it for another day? Like how does that work? Or is it all intertwined? 

Alreen Haeggquist: Yeah, it's all intertwined. So yeah, that's how I thought you were using the co, the coaching aspect.

Alreen Haeggquist: That's what I do with my clients, right? And people that are not my clients. I'm coaching them to come forward because I believe by speaking out and not keeping it inside you, that is really your start to your healing journey from experiencing some form of sexual assault. And so I do, you know, I talk about the issue.

Alreen Haeggquist: I go on podcasts, I speak on the topic. My clients I talk to about potential clients I talk to about, and the, the emotional part is completely intertwined because that's how it's affected you, that it's affected you emotionally. So we have to talk about it. And then my job is to understand how it's impacted you and then be able to tell your story, right.

Alreen Haeggquist: Of what, what this did to you and how it's affected you to get money. Right? [00:22:00] The cases I work on, at the end of the day, I can't change what happened. I obtain money 'cause money is justice in our system. And so we obtain money for the harm that you suffered and that's how you can move on, you know, with your life and close this chapter.

Alreen Haeggquist: And so that's my job is to understand the emotional harm that they'd experienced and then be able to go to a judge and a jury and the, you know, the other attorney. Can we explain the harm that this has caused and why they should pay the amount that I'm asking for? 

Serena Reynolds: Can I, can I ask so. The women that come forward and stuff.

Serena Reynolds: It's, it's a very brave, like you said, it, it, they're at the, they're at breaking point. They, when they c come to you, they just don't know where else to go. Um, do you, do you feel as though justice really does get done? Do you think that they do move on with their life? Do they find it difficult to get additional jobs?

Serena Reynolds: You might not be able to answer this, but does this follow them around? I'm, I'm asking this because I feel as though this is a real fear [00:23:00] for, for people coming forward. 

Alreen Haeggquist: That's why I, and I know that like, I know when they, when they come, they have all of those things. Am I gonna find another job? Is everybody gonna know about this?

Alreen Haeggquist: You know, what are people gonna think? Is my other employer gonna think I'm just a troublemaker? Am I gonna be known professionally? Right. Especially for professional women. You know, you've worked so hard. To become the CEO or the lawyer, whatever position you are, you've worked really hard to get there and they're so worried that that's what they're gonna get remembered by, right?

Alreen Haeggquist: That they came forward about a sexual harassment issue or came forward about sexual assault. They're gonna remember, be remembered for that as opposed to. All of the work they did at the company. Um, so these are real fears, but that's what I'm saying, like after, you know, doing this work for over 20 years, I've seen women on the other side and everybody is better off.

Alreen Haeggquist: Not necessarily because they went through the justice system, right? I'm not saying, oh, by filing a lawsuit, you're better off. But it's the fact that they didn't allow it. For the other side to say that didn't happen, right? They didn't brush it [00:24:00] under the rug, they didn't pretend like nothing happened. They stood up for themselves and said, what you did to me was wrong and I'm gonna hold you accountable for it.

Alreen Haeggquist: And that's the piece that's empowering to them. And that's why I say they are better off at the end of it. 

Serena Reynolds: I'm so proud of every woman that ever, ever steps up and, and has their say and, and tries to break the cycles that, that we. That so many have lived under for for decades, millennials. 

Alreen Haeggquist: And what's interesting, you know, one of the things I always think, you know, if you're going through this process, you know, you identify like why you're doing it, why it's important.

Alreen Haeggquist: Because sometimes, you know, our doing it for ourselves isn't enough. Like we don't think we're worthy enough to stand up for ourselves. And I see that in women that come forward. You know, if they can't do it for themselves, they're doing it because they don't want their daughter to know that their mom took this and didn't say anything.

Alreen Haeggquist: 'cause they don't want their daughter. To do the same thing. Or they have a colleague, you know, they didn't say anything when it happened to them, but then they see their colleague [00:25:00] experiencing the same thing and you're like, I am not gonna let this happen to my colleague. So if they do it to protect somebody else, then I think that's really a powerful, and then again, it starts flipping to wanting to do it, you know, for themselves and, and seeing how it, um, impacted them and empowered them in the process.

Sara Ferrer: And in your journey, you've written a book. You've written a book, which it's called Fire Fired Up Fueling Triumph from Trauma. So was that kind of your, I'm doing this naturally for myself to tell my story. Can you guide us through how, you know, from law firm attorney to to author, how did that happen?

Sara Ferrer: What was the, what was the reason why, what was the inspiration behind it? What's been the reaction now that it's. All out there. 

Alreen Haeggquist: We were talking about earlier about the Me Too movement and the Mo Me Too movement. Like I was saying, I was so excited for all these women to come forward. I was like cheering them on.

Alreen Haeggquist: And um, during that time I felt like such a pathetic hypocrite because I [00:26:00] couldn't say the words. Me too. I couldn't say it. 'cause I was still in that place of being so ashamed of what happened to me and I didn't need to tell everybody what happened. I could have just said me too, but I couldn't even do that.

Alreen Haeggquist: And so for me, as I went through my healing journey and I, you know, went through therapy and I did a, a bunch of different modalities. The book was my Me too. It was me coming out and saying, yes, this happened to me. And I had never said anything before. I had never spoken out before. And again, because I'd seen the empowerment that my clients felt, that was the way I did it.

Alreen Haeggquist: Right. It wasn't a lawsuit to be had. It was coming forward and saying, this is what happened to me. I wanted to show other women the benefits of it, and I didn't know how else to do that besides writing a book and telling you my own experience of going through the process and then seeing it from my clients of the process that they went through.

Alreen Haeggquist: I would say it was a difficult journey I had, I had journaled in college. You know, I always tell women, you know, if you, if you're not ready [00:27:00] to speak out, the first thing you can do is journal. Right? Just get it out of your head and start putting it out on paper so it's not just like ruminating inside.

Alreen Haeggquist: And so I had journaled in college and so writing the book was really like the first time of identifying, you know. Not only what happened to me, but how it made me feel and the impacts that it had on me during that time. I mean, as a child I was, you know, very depressed. I was suicidal, which is so foreign now, right?

Alreen Haeggquist: Like, I can't even imagine being in that place. But as you write the book and you were editing it and going through all that, it, it brings all of those emotions back up. So I would say it was difficult emotionally. But then like each time you did an edit, right? Like you write it down, you edit it, um, it like didn't carry the weight anymore.

Alreen Haeggquist: Like, you know, the first time, you know, crying, second time probably still crying, and then it just like stopped and it, and that's been the same process as I start talking about it. It just continues to lift this heavy [00:28:00] weight that you didn't know you were carrying. But now that it's gone, you're like, how did I, like, how did I live like that?

Alreen Haeggquist: Right. It's so freeing and that's I think, a process. Like I can tell you that, but you're not gonna really know that until you go through it. So that's how the process was while writing it and each step, right. It was another thing, right? First it's like writing it. Then it's like getting it in a book, but then it's letting it out to the public.

Alreen Haeggquist: Right now I've, I've really let it out. Everybody knows, right? And, and same thing. That was really empowering because like, I'm not really afraid of it anymore. It doesn't bother me. It's like, yes, this horrible thing happened, but here I am, you know, better off, not better off for it, but just who I am because of it.

Alreen Haeggquist: Right. I don't think I'd be able to. To be where I'm at right now if I didn't have those experiences because it definitely made me very resilient and very fired up. 

Serena Reynolds: I'm in complete awe of your resilience and your strength. 

Sara Ferrer: Yes, especially since family was [00:29:00] tied in with this. So I have to imagine family had, you know, reactions and this is not, and again, I'm not diminishing if it was a colleague or work like it, it's bad all around, but when it's really one degree of separation versus three or four.

Sara Ferrer: That sounds heavy on so many levels. Uh, so specifically with family, how was that received or had you healed at that point or, I know healing's a process. Let me not suggest it stops, but was that, was that kind of unearthing something that maybe had been in the healing process? What did that look like?

Alreen Haeggquist: Well, you know, my family, we've, I'm the youngest of 10 kids. I don't know if, if we talked about that before, but I'm the youngest of 10 kids. You know, the youngest of six girls, right? And so the abuse in my home, you know, didn't, you know, start with me and, but it did end with me. Um, and so. We, in my family, we've just really never talked about it, right?

Alreen Haeggquist: Like we've talked about it to a certain degree, but again, you push it under the rug like, [00:30:00] we're fine, we're functioning, you know, get over it, right? And so me coming out with the book, I really tried to be mindful of the fact that my story was part of their story, right? Like, I didn't wanna tell what happened to them, but what happened to me did have an impact on my siblings.

Alreen Haeggquist: So, yeah, so it was a tough year, I would say. I don't, I think for me, I had a lot of tools, right? I've been going to therapy. I've been on this healing journey for a while, and. Siblings haven't been. So that was hard. I, I, I kind of forced the issue on them, right? Like I had been dealing with it. They might not have been ready, but I forced them to deal with the issue by publishing a book.

Alreen Haeggquist: So I would say it was, it was a tough year because I don't think they understood why I was doing it or why I did it. Um, and I had, you know, a lot of silent treatment, I would say, for the, for the past year, but. Like everything, time does heal, right? And I'm still the same person. I [00:31:00] just, I'm not keeping this thing a secret anymore in our family.

Alreen Haeggquist: So we can talk about it or not, but I am not gonna be quiet about it. And 

Serena Reynolds: that shows a huge amount of bravery because you were, you knew the consequences that you could have been facing by coming out, which is so unfair because it wasn't your fault. That's the injustice about all this. It wasn't your fault.

Serena Reynolds: You did nothing wrong, and yet you still had to had to face those some consequences. I'm hoping now that that's, you know, you are good with your family and things are better than they ever were. 

Sara Ferrer: Yeah. I mean, sometimes I think too, what, what we hear about a lot, and this will tie into the question, we're gonna ask you that in, in a little bit, but sometimes, you know.

Sara Ferrer: It's the unknown, right? Whether you're a business owner with that, whether it's conversations within your own family, there's a lot of unknown or known, but not spoken, [00:32:00] right? And so this ties into what we like to do at, or, you know, at nearing somewhat of the end of the conversation. Um, we like to, we like to surprise you.

Sara Ferrer: Now, we'd like to play a game of, we have a, a question that you don't know about from our previous guest. Barring in mind that our previous guest, I believe she worked in bookkeeping services, so completely different industry. And just to give you some context, she talked a lot about, you know, kind of her clients coming in and kind of putting their, their fingers in the ears and going, la, la, la, la la.

Sara Ferrer: I don't really know about, about profit or this or that. I don't really need to know my, understand my books and how that has impacted them. Right. Ignorance is bliss until it's really not. So, right. So with that said, because that, that's kind of the, the preamble to the question where we asked her, what do you wanna ask our next guests?

Sara Ferrer: And she said, how has paying attention [00:33:00] or not paying attention, it made an impact in your business? So a very, kind of, a bit of a vague general question, but take that for what it's worth. How has paying attention or not paying attention made an impact in your business? 

Alreen Haeggquist: Um, you know, I would talk about this, and I'd use the word intentional versus non intentional, right?

Alreen Haeggquist: Like a lot of the things I did in my business were not intentional, right? Because I had the passion or the drive to do the work. The business might not have been, you know, at its best. But we were still building a reputation. We were still doing good cases, but the business wasn't there. The business aspect of the law wasn't there.

Alreen Haeggquist: And then I think just having the intention of like wanting to run a business and be a business owner, not just a lawyer, but a business owner and what that looks like. I think that's really taken my law firm to the next level. Um, it's just being intentional about the work, the culture, and the place I wanted to create.

Alreen Haeggquist: And I think that's just taken us to a whole nother [00:34:00] level that we wouldn't have been in if I continued to live in this unintentional not paying attention world that I wasn't. 

Sara Ferrer: What does that look like? What, because you, when you said it, you, you lit up, you smiled the like, like the, I wanna, I, I wanna become a part of the team.

Sara Ferrer: What does that look like when we work together? What's the environment? 

Alreen Haeggquist: Yeah. So we have a very great team. We, we always describe ourselves as a very work hard, play hard type of group. So it is pretty intense, right? During the work that we do, we just talked about how it is and the work that, and the people that we're going after.

Alreen Haeggquist: Um, so that part's really intense and so the team gets together regularly. For fun things. You know, we have, like, we just had, we celebrated our 17 year anniversary on Tuesday, so we went out for half hour. People, you know, bring their spouses and their kids and it's a very family environment 'cause we do spend a lot of time together.

Alreen Haeggquist: They work well together. We have a very team, team environment. So all the work is done as a team and you know, always like very client centric grow. Everybody's wanting to do the right thing [00:35:00] for the client. That's at the end all, you know, the most important thing to us. And then just always being, wanting to be better.

Alreen Haeggquist: Right? So the whole team has this like evolving every day. Like we are always trying to better ourselves, better the firm, you know, better our processes, whatever it may be, but never being stagnant or mediocre on anything we do. Okay. That's the environment and you would like it. 

Sara Ferrer: I love it. I love it. It feels like you know the best of both worlds.

Sara Ferrer: Justice is being served and we're hanging out and having a little fun on the side. 

Serena Reynolds: Hugely fulfilling job when it goes right. I'm sure. 

Alreen Haeggquist: Yes. And that's what, you know, like we can fight with them, but like having a a, a nice place where you come to where you enjoy working at with the people that you're with is so important, you know?

Alreen Haeggquist: So I intentionally, you know, put my efforts into making that. And it's nice now to see, and that's probably why I lit up, like I made an intention to do that. And it's nice that other people that work here can see it and feel it. And that's the [00:36:00] response that I get. Yeah. 

Serena Reynolds: And I really love your, your use of intention.

Serena Reynolds: Of the word intention to intentionally go out and do stuff. I think many of us, uh, female entrepreneurs, um, drift into entrepreneurship through circumstance situations. We've heard that a lot, the accidental entrepreneur. So I, I, I love that whole in intentional side of things. I think that's very powerful and I think we, we all need to do a little bit more.

Serena Reynolds: We've been working 17 

Serena Reynolds: years, she 

Serena Reynolds: said.

Serena Reynolds: I know. That's impressive. 

Alreen Haeggquist: We went from a team of two to 20, you know, and so that's been by, you know, creating this like culture and environment, um, and always putting back into the people, right? We always put it back towards the people that we work with. 

Serena Reynolds: So before we ask your question, I have to ask this.

Serena Reynolds: So you've been in this business for 17 years and you wrote your book about, was it five years ago you said? 

Alreen Haeggquist: I've actually been in this business for [00:37:00] 23 years. I worked at a law firm, very male dominated law firm for the first five, and then I created my own law firm. Um, so my firm has been in existence for 17 and my book I published in the fall of 23, so about two years old.

Serena Reynolds: So, so, um, your timeline, it, it's, so, so you intentionally started this company, so you obviously knew exactly what you were doing and who you were going to help and why you were doing it, even if you didn't speak it out, out loud. 

Alreen Haeggquist: Exactly. Even though you didn't feel then it had happened to me when I did it.

Alreen Haeggquist: Yes. 

Sara Ferrer: Wow. That is that, yeah. That's like a full circle moment. Mm-hmm. And what question would you ask the next guest? Do you have no idea who they're gonna be? I would say, um, what gets you fired up? Hmm. That's a good one. I like that. 'cause you can take that a lot of different ways. Yeah, you really could [00:38:00] listen.

Sara Ferrer: We've got guests that interpret things a thousand in one ways, you know, and, and again, it could also be like. People could answer with work. What gets you fired up from work? What gets you fired up? Uh, you know, outside of work 

Serena Reynolds: we're just gonna leave it. What gets you fired up? 

Sara Ferrer: Fired up. It could just be like a good, a good lunch.

Sara Ferrer: A good with a good cold brew. Let me tell you, baby Sara, I do. And a good caffeine Bruce. I love that. What gets you up? We're gonna, we're gonna make note of that and then, you know, for our listeners who have heard your story, know where you've been, know kind of, you know, that, hey, things are, things sound like they're, they're going well in terms of intentionality.

Sara Ferrer: What does the future look like? What, you know, if we ping in two, three years, where are you? What are you doing? Are you writing part two of the book? 

Alreen Haeggquist: People always ask me about part two of the book. I'm, I'm not there yet. I'm not thinking about part two because I think I told you it was a [00:39:00] process to get to part one and I think I'm still living part two.

Alreen Haeggquist: For me, the future looks like just continuing to grow the firm and continuing to help the women that we do, and continuing to develop our reputation and who we are, you know, across the state. We're very well known here in San Diego. Um, but continuing to expand that base. 

Serena Reynolds: Obviously we want to ask you how people can contact you, but because of the very important work that you do, um, and, and the fact that we are a female, uh, podcast.

Serena Reynolds: I really want to ask you, um, not only how do people get hold of you, but what would they expect when they do get hold of you? What would be the first thing that they would have to have to I, I don't know. What's, what's the process that they would face so that we can kind of eliminate some of the fear that might, might be behind people making these decisions?

Alreen Haeggquist: Sure. So if they're coming in for a legal consultation at my law firm, [00:40:00] then the first thing they would get is the intake person who takes down their basic information. And then the second thing they would get is a call from myself or one of the other partners. There's three other partners. We get a call back from one of us.

Alreen Haeggquist: If it's a sexual assault and the sexual harassment case, our survivor advocate is the intake person that handles all of those calls because of the sensitive nature. So and so she would be the one handling all of those calls, then the call from the partner, and then a in-person meeting. Right. That's when we meet, when we meet face to face about what happened.

Alreen Haeggquist: And then we explain the whole process, like after they've made a choice of what you know, which avenue they wanna take, we get started with the process of standing up with them. So I think what they is unusual about our firm is. It's just about the, you know, the team, right? I think it's really important for you to know that you're not alone.

Alreen Haeggquist: And so just right off the bat, by coming to us, you not only get, you know, the lawyer, you get the associate lawyer, there's a paralegal, there's a legal assistant, and there's a survivor advocate [00:41:00] who's there to help you throughout the whole process. So I think they get that right off the bat, and that's really, really helpful.

Alreen Haeggquist: Um, just again, because they think they're so alone, like, wait, there's all these people that are here to help me and, and be with me by my side. 

Sara Ferrer: That's, that's, that's actually, that's a great question too, Serena. 'cause I think a lot of times 'cause of the sensitive nature of it, like your website, Alreen.com, A-L-R-E-E-N.com.

Sara Ferrer: It'll be on our site. But yeah, good question. Or Serena. 'cause I, I didn't even realize, like before people even reach out sometimes the, but what if, but what if, ah, what do I need to do? 

Serena Reynolds: What am I, what am I putting myself forward for here? I've gone through enough. I, I don't think I can deal with this. 

Alreen Haeggquist: Yeah.

Alreen Haeggquist: And our, our role is really, I mean, we recognize that. And so one thing that's really important to us is that we don't wanna make you repeat your story over and over again. Like, first you gotta talk to this person, then you gotta talk to this person. So that's really important to us to not have you repeat everything.

Alreen Haeggquist: Um, but what we also have learned as we do this work [00:42:00] that people who have experienced trauma don't tell their story all at once. Like, you don't get it all out in just one sitting, right? Like. Some pieces come out here and then on another conversation, additional pieces come out. And so we try to focus on that, okay, this is what you said here, let's talk about this.

Alreen Haeggquist: Um, and it's more of a continuation of conversation as opposed to having to repeat over and over. 

Sara Ferrer: Got it. And the website is the best place to find, or what are their avenues do people reach out to you from, besides the webiste. 

Alreen Haeggquist: My firm website is haelaw.com and you said my personal website and then, you know, social media.

Alreen Haeggquist: Lots of people contact us through social media, so that's another place to find us. And it's the same, it's all re on Instagram. 

Sara Ferrer: Wonderful. Wonderful. Your story has just been, I, for me, very empowering. Like it's a subject that I think, you know, many people, if not. If not conveyed in the right way, it can, you can leave feeling very helpless, very, very much in like a, what's next?

Sara Ferrer: What do we do? But [00:43:00] I leave this conversation thinking, holy shoot, thank God we got the res of the world doing the work, you know, working hard, playing hard, really processing all the information and being a resource for others. So thank you. Thank you for sharing your story personally, professionally, the, the merging of the two.

Sara Ferrer: So any listeners who wanna learn more, all of your information will be. 

Serena Reynolds: And do you only deal with and and before we leave, do you only do San Diego or, or do you go broader? Let's just get that 

Alreen Haeggquist: we go all across State of California. Yeah, all across the state of California. That's where we're licensed to practice.

Serena Reynolds: Wonderful. Thank you so much. 

Alreen Haeggquist: All right. It's a pleasure.