Treat every “no” as information about timing, fit or the buyer, not a ruling on you. Feel the sting for an evening, ask what they needed that you didn’t show them, change the angle and go again. Whenever you can, let the product do the pitching.
“Don’t take it personally,” says the polite advice. Brilliant. It’s your business. It has your name on the invoices. Of course it’s personal.
Why it’s harder than it sounds
Rejection hurts in a way that isn’t only a figure of speech. A team led by University of Michigan psychologist Ethan Kross scanned people looking at a photo of the ex who had dumped them, and brain areas tied to the physical sensation of pain became active. The study in PNAS concluded that rejection and physical pain “share a common somatosensory representation.”
So when a buyer’s two-line “not for us” email lands like a stubbed toe, that’s your brain doing its job. Annoying. Normal.
And in business it’s rarely one no. It’s the cold email, the “we’ve gone another direction,” the buyer who reads your message and vanishes. Each one small. Stack them up and you’ve lost a week.
What actually works
Let it sting, then get nosy
Give it the evening. Then ask the useful question. One goat milk skincare president who pitched big retailers turned every no into homework: “what does this retailer need? How do I present the brand? That makes sense for them also”.
A no to your pitch is often a no to the way you framed it. That part you can change by Thursday.
Find another angle
She was told flat out: “no, we’re not interested in you. You’re too small.” Her answer was “when you say no to me, I’m like, I’m just gonna find another angle”. She called. She emailed. She found buyers on LinkedIn. She mailed a little gift.
She also once went to a retailer’s corporate offices to find the buyer and stood there so long she thought the guy was going to throw her out of the building. (We’re endorsing the gift. Not the loitering.)
Let the product do the pitching
She stopped asking for an answer on the spot. She sent samples, “enough for everybody in the office,” and told them: “I’ll be in touch in the next couple of weeks. I’m not even worried about it ’cause I know you’re gonna call me.”
Confidence like that is hard to say no to. If you sell a service, your sample is a short audit, a teardown, or a tightly scoped first session. Something they can hold, use and pass around.
Follow up like you expect a yes
Her honest number: “it was about a 50 50 shot.” Half the time buyers called her. The other half she had to ask, “Hey, how’s that sample working out?” Following up is half the job. Nobody ever landed a retailer by staring at the phone.
Hear it from someone who’s done it
Karen Minsky is president of Dionis Goat Milk Skincare. She talks about pitching retailers after what she calls “massive rejection,” the too-small brush-off, and the samples that changed the conversation. Jump to 8:09 for the moment, or catch the audio on the episode page.
FAQ
How do I get over the fear of rejection when pitching?
You don’t get over it first and pitch second. You pitch scared, often, until the no’s stop feeling like news. Prepare one question for every no (“What would make this a fit?”) so the sting has somewhere useful to go.
Is it normal to take rejection in business personally?
Yes. The Michigan brain-scan study suggests rejection runs on some of the same wiring as physical pain. Feeling it is normal. Acting on the feeling (deleting the pitch deck, swearing off LinkedIn forever) is optional.
How many times should I follow up after a no?
A no to this offer, this month, isn’t a no forever. Ask if you can check back next quarter, and come back with something new: a result, a sample, a better fit. If they ask you to stop, stop.
How do I handle rejection in B2B sales?
Track the reasons, not just the count. If three buyers say “too small,” that’s a positioning problem you can fix, maybe with a smaller first order or a pilot.
Or skip the cold pitch altogether and invite the people you’d pitch onto your own show. Captrr, Serena’s podcast company, reports a 65 to 80% acceptance rate on guest invitations. Much nicer than loitering in a lobby.